There is a long road ahead of us, for one thing we need to get some blood tests done to rule out any possibilities of any other abnormalities that usually go along with having autism. Once that is done than we are going to schedule him some more testing in speech, and other areas to really pinpoint where he needs the most services. When we went in for the diagnosis I asked Thomas how he felt about everything and he said, "I don't know if I feel anything, we already know that he has something so I don't know what the difference will be after we hear what they have to say," As we were sitting there waiting for the doctor to tell us our results I could see that Thomas's demeanor changed a bit. The finality of it all soon came to be when the doctor said, "The speech doctor and the psychiatrist both believe your son to have autism." Then came the results of his testing which was a little harder to swallow. His language skills are that of a 2 year old, and I actually found that hard to believe because I have an easier time communicating with Lainey than I do with Madden. That is when the doctor told me that Lainey might actually be ahead of the curve. An interesting thing to hear is that your five year old is quite behind and your two year old is more advanced. While this is only in one area of his skill set, you hate to think of your child being behind in anything. He is also way behind in his communication skills, his social skills, yada, yada, yada. As a parent you start having fears of his future and all the struggles that are to come his way. Will he ever be able to catch up to peers his age and will be ever be able to answer my questions without getting frustrated. However this is not the route I plan to take.
Being positive is not normally my strong suit. I usually think of worst case scenario in almost all other aspects of my life but when it comes to Madden, or I should say my kids in general, I refuse to be negative. Madden brings me joy beyond words and has shown such improvement in these past 2 years that I know he will continue to grow in his knowledge and learning. The other high note from our diagnosis is the fact that the doctor's believe he is high functioning. Autism is the diagnosis, but the severity level of it determines so much. The range goes from high functioning to low functioning. High functioning like Madden means he is verbal, gives eye contact, and is not sensitive to touch. People on the low side of the spectrum are nonverbal, don't give eye contact, and don't like any form of touch. There are of course other criteria that fit in there but I won't bother with all the details right now. Madden is verbal and that means he will most likely be able to improve his verbal skills and hopefully someday hold a very normal conversation with us. Those are the things that I strive for with my son and I will do whatever I have to to try and get him the services he needs to get there. Just as I am sure any parent would move heaven and earth for their child if they had to!
